For I know – all about Lauren
Jeremiah 29:11 11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Jeremiah 29:11 is filled with promise, trust, true love, and safety. It is a promise from the Lord that He will lead you, bring you to green pastures, to give you hope, and protect you. As He is speaking this verse out, I imagine the tone He is using is one filled with love, a sense of longing to protect you and longing for the absolute best for you.
This verse was my one of my best friends Lauren’s favorite verses. It never mattered what she was struggling with, she truly believed that the Lord was a faithful and loving God who would not harm her. Instead He had plans for her to prosper. She lived every day in pain, never allowing it to get in her way to serve and love people. The Lord had a strong and intentional call on her life.
Lauren trusted the Lord. He used her to love others exactly where they are. When they are feeling lost, alone, scared, hopeless, or in pain, Lauren was there to shine her light, to make them feel special & loved. Lauren was so good at seeing people for who they were, for their spirit. She did not see age, color, or disability. She just wanted to serve and help others…even if that meant she had set aside her troubles. Lauren never second guessed putting others first and being selfless. Lauren would peruse people like it was her duty. It didn’t matter what you did or would say to her, it could never stop her in her relentless pursuit of loving you. Lauren had the biggest heart. She guided & connected so many people to different communities, doctors, hospitals, procedures, and reassured them that there was a light on the other side.
It has been nearly three weeks since Lauren passed. I still am wrestling with the emotions that come with losing someone so close. I haven’t stopped thinking about her and how I would push her outside of her comfort zone to see another side of the world. I would always turn Lauren bright red & make her squeal “noo” out of embarrassment.
It’s been nearly three weeks and I am still kicking myself for missing opportunities to hang out and spend time with you. It has been three weeks and I’m still searching for the words, the emotions, something to fill the void in my life that you once filled. In fact, you still fill that spot. But I have to hold onto our memories instead of being able to make new ones. I haven’t lost someone so dear to my heart.
Here is my prayer for anyone who is experiencing the loss of Lauren, or the loss of anyone.
Papa, thank you for your goodness. Thank you for the love that you have given each and every single one of us. Thank you for the way you connect us to one another – that you give us the ability to speak life, love, and push each other. Thank you for friends, the memories that we have had the pleasure of making. Lord, thank you for knowing what is better for us, even when we think we know what is better. Thank you for making the hard decisions, and loving us through every blessing you give unto us. Papa, I pray you send down your peace that passes all understanding. Papa, I pray that through our pain and weakness you are glorified. Thank you that you understand and love us even when we are upset, angry, and screaming “why” to the heavens. Papa, Thank you for the life that you gave to Lauren. Thank you for all of the lives that she touched during her time on this Earth. Thank you for the tears, the interruptions, and the ability to hug the people around us love a little bit tighter. Papa, thank you for healing Lauren and taking her pain away. I am so happy that you get to wrap your arms around her. I don’t understand your plans, or your reasoning’s, but I am choosing to trust you. Lord, wrap your arms around every person who Lauren touched. Surround them in your comfort, and just snuggle them. Lord, I don’t understand, but I am choosing to trust in you. Amen.
